Tuesday, October 9, 2007

Golf Guide for Hackers

I don't have a lot going on today. I'm hoping to get out to the course after work, but it's supposed to be 94 freakin degrees today. Man I thought we were done with the heat. I know this is old, but it still makes me laugh.

A Hackers Guide to Golf
Table of Contents

Chapter 1 - How to Properly Line Up Your Fourth Putt

Chapter 2 - How to Hit a Dunlop from the Rough When You Hit a Titleist from the Tee

Chapter 3 - How to Avoid the Water When You Lie 8 in a Bunker

Chapter 4 - How to Get More Distance off the Shank

Chapter 5 - When to Give the Ranger the Finger

Chapter 6 - Using Your Shadow on the Greens to Maximize Earnings

Chapter 7 - When to Implement Handicap Management

Chapter 8 - Proper Excuses for Drinking Beer Before 9:00 a.m.

Chapter 9 - How to Rationalize a 6 Hour Round

Chapter 10 - How to Find That Ball That Everyone Else Saw Go in the Water

Chapter 11 - Why Your Spouse Doesn't Care That You Birdied the 5th

Chapter 12 - How to Let a Foursome Play Through Your Twosome

Chapter 13 - How to Relax When You Are Hitting Three off the Tee

Chapter 14 - When to Suggest Major Swing Corrections to Your Opponent

Chapter 15 - God and the Meaning of the Birdie-to-Bogey Three Putt

Chapter 16 - How to Properly Grip a Golf Club

Chapter 17 - The Correct Time to Fart When Your Partner is Going to Putt

Chapter 18 - Rules Interpretation: "Loss of Ball is Penalty Enough…"

Chapter 19 - When to Re-grip Your Ball Retriever Due to Wear

Chapter 20 - Explaining Lighted Golf Balls to Your Spouse When You Get Home After Midnight

Chapter 21 - Why Male Golfers Will Pay $5.00 a Beer from the Cart Girl and Give Her a $3 Tip, But Will Balk at $3.50 at the 19th Hole and Stiff the Bartender

I found this on a blog and forget which one it was, so I'm sorry for that.

Hit 'em straight,
Dale

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